day 20.

Day 20, Monday: Get real. Share something you're struggling with right now. 

As I've been reading through a few of these today, I've noticed a common theme about this subject: we're all hesitant to write about this. As I sit here with an hour left in the day, I keep getting this nudge to blog. It's hard to be vulnerable and I don't want to come off like I'm complaining about something that doesn't matter.
The thing that has been bothering me lately is transition. I'm at a time in my life where things are drastically changing. I'm constantly learning more about myself and the path God wants me to take. My first year at Mizzou started out rough, but I know it's exactly where God wants me to be. I'm already so grateful for the relationships He's blessed me with in Columbia. 
I'm currently home for the summer and it's always so good to be with family. Home will always be home and there's nothing quite like the comfort it provides. The hardest part though about being home are the friendships here. I've kept in contact with a couple of my close friends, but losing others terrifies me. I'm such a people pleaser and I start blaming myself for friendships that I see slipping away. I try to apologize and fix things, but feel defeated that there's not a lot I can do beyond that. 
It's such a weird time. No, I don't sit here dwelling on this, but it's definitely something that bothers me (especially since summer has just begun). Adjusting to this transition isn't easy, but I know the great girls sticking by my side are truly blessings. It is so easy to fret, but I have to remind myself that God will continue to guide me. 

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